30+ Memes That Perfectly Describe the Absurdity of Disney Princess Logic

Growing up, we were taught the dangers that come with interacting with strangers. Disney’s Sleeping Beauty, however, had a different lesson in store for us. Clearly, sweet Aurora throws away all those PSAs about “stranger danger” out the window.

But, why would she forsake any thought of personal safety? For a smokin’ hot prince, of course! Wait, you mean to tell us that we should go off with a conventionally pretty person that we don’t know? Who knew?!

If any of you aren’t anxiety-riddled control freaks in an out-of-control world, then this meme really isn’t going to do anything for you. But, for the rest of us? Poor Alice and her many tears are super relatable.

The worst part is that even after going through this cycle of analyzing, overreacting, and then being fine, we’re not going to learn anything for next time. So, to all our over-thinking brethren out there, we feel your pain!

Clearly, Disney princess movies are the reason we all think our hair would look absolutely magical, blowing dramatically behind us. Remember that scene in Beauty and the Beast where Belle sings she wants to “travel in the great wide somewhere” with her silky locks beautifully gliding in the breeze?

Just think of any scene with Pocahontas listening to her ancestors in the wind… Sadly for us, if we tried to be dramatically aesthetic, all that would happen is the wind would blow our hair straight into our mouths. Bleh.

As anyone fond of putting on heavy makeup knows, the worst part is having to scrub it all off at the end of the day. But according to Mulan, in Disney princess land, getting makeup off is no trouble at all.

It just has to happen at the most emotionally reflective time of your “I Want” song (you know, that song at the start of the movie that tells you what the princess wants to accomplish). Clearly, being dramatic has its perks.

We often talk about how the representation of men in Disney films has created impossible standards of romance for women. But, we don’t talk enough about the impossible beauty standards that these fictional men impose on boys and men.

Now, obviously, there are people all over the world who lack the ability to grow an impressive beard. But, that really isn’t the case with this ape-man, is it? Maybe one of the gorillas learned how to give him a shave?

A favorite pastime of many internet trolls is to attempt to poke endless holes in the plots of our favorite movies. Many times, there’s not much there for them to actually poke (or no one cares). But, sometimes, like in this case, they hit the jackpot.

While she might not know what a fork is, from watching the movie, we know that Ariel knows how to write — after all, she had no trouble signing that contract with Ursula. But, why let logic get in the way of a great story, right?

So, one of the key ingredients to a good magic story is consistency in the rules that govern the magic in it. Like, true love’s kiss will break all curses, or if you truly wish upon a star, your wish will come true.

The real genius is breaking those rules without us realizing it. But, that didn’t actually happen with Cinderella’s glass shoe, did it? Because it really doesn’t make sense that, at midnight, the dress is gone, but the slipper isn’t.

Look, we’re all drawn toward flashy, sparkly lights (just look at Times Square or Vegas), but, hopefully, we know better than to actually go near those lights when we can sense that they might be just slightly dangerous.

But, apparently, Disney princesses are moths, because they just can’t help but walk straight into danger, no matter how many warning signs are placed before them. Seriously, if the next princess also touches something shiny that she shouldn’t, we might just scream.

We love it when a princess uses her head and questions the validity of certain aspects of her story — like Jasmin does with Aladdin’s magic carpet ride. Unfortunately, that logic only seems to extend so far into the story.

It’s kind of “the rule of cool” — Jasmine’s tiger’s existence as a pet, which should be considered highly dangerous no matter how supposedly domesticated he is, isn’t even questioned because it’s just so cool that this princess has a pet tiger!

When Tangled came out, it was a massive hit with people of all ages (this was before Frozen mania, of course). We think there’s a special reason for its success, other than it is a fantastic movie.

That reason is the fact that the fantastically snarky Flynn Rider is completely logical, while Rapunzel absolutely isn’t! That little combination makes their shenanigans all the more fun for us viewers as we scream at the screen for Rapunzel to listen to her sarcastic companion.

As anyone who’s ever seen or read the story of Cinderella can tell you, the most important part of the story revolves around her perfect glass slipper, which only fits her dainty little feet.

But, if that’s actually the case, this post brings up the very good point of “how did it slip off?” Clearly, the magic of the plot needing to move forward took over, and daintily took the shoe off and left it on the stairs for our prince to find.

We’ve all heard the old adage that “if you love something, set it free,” right? Well, looks like the Beast missed that lesson in class. Of course, he does eventually get it and lets Belle go back to her father.

But, really, we bet she would have loved him a whole lot sooner if he had just opened those big castle doors for her. Plus, this way, no one would have called out the movie for depicting a messed up case of Stockholm syndrome.

Rapunzel certainly taught little kids everywhere that it’s okay and even important to sometimes step out of your comfort zone and confront your fears. Because, if you do, you might just get to see the floating lanterns up close.

It’s also a pretty good lesson to learn that simple household items can turn into defense weapons in your time of need. But, that bit about running away with strange men? Maybe we should be a bit more cautious about that.

Disney films aren’t just classics because they’re old; it’s because they’re timeless. This means you can watch them throughout your life and keep finding new insights into them. For example, as a kid, it made perfect sense that the prince didn’t know what Cinderella looked like.

That’s why he had to use her shoe to find her. As an adult, though, you understand that his eyes were glued to a different body part altogether — if you catch our drift. So, of course, he didn’t know what she looked like!

We all wish our anonymous prince charming would magically appear in our lives and swoop us off to live happily ever after — and it’s all Disney’s fault! Seriously, after seeing Snow White, Aurora, Cinderella, and many more find love this way, can you blame us?

But, here comes Kristoff with some serious wisdom to remind us all that it really isn’t the best idea to devote your whole life at the drop of a hat to a person you just met.

It’s nothing new that movies give us unrealistic expectations about love. But, who knew the thing that Disney would be lying to us about was our hair?! Honestly, though, we blame not just The Little Mermaid, but every mermaid movie!

Look, after growing up watching Splash, Aquamarine, and, of course, The Little Mermaid, it’s no wonder that any time one of us goes in the water, we all pretend to be those magical dwellers of the sea. Too bad our hair never looks as pretty.

We know that we often mentally connect random people we’ve hardly met with the setting in which we know them in — it’s why it might take you a few minutes to recognize a person from your old school when you randomly see them at the beach.

So, Jasmin’s mix-up could possibly be explained by that. But, really, considering the only other men she’s met, according to the movie, are her father and Jafar, she really doesn’t have an excuse for not recognizing the handsome street rat, does she?

While this might be a little embarrassing to admit aloud, we all know that it’s true — prince Adam from Beauty and the Beast is much more attractive as a fearsome beast than he is as a scrawny human.

But, really, considering he transformed in front of her very eyes — plus, there isn’t anyone else on that balcony with them — Belle really shouldn’t be as clueless as she is about who is this oh-so-mysterious man before her. There were even fireworks!

One of the key features of the more recent Disney films is their willingness to make fun of the silly lessons that the older movies tried to teach us — in other words, exactly what these memes are laughing at.

Unfortunately for them, that plan can sometimes backfire and make them into their very own meme. So, of course, Elsa’s famous line that you can’t marry a man you just met has become its very own online joke!

So many Disney princess lessons, so little time. Definitely, one of our favorite silly lessons has to do with our friends from the animal kingdom. After all, we all know, you’re not a real royal unless you have at least one animal companion.

Clearly, as royal wannabes, we’re always on the lookout for an adorably cartoonish puppy — or maybe we just want to pet and snuggle every furball around us. And no one’s going to make us feel bad about our love for those four-legged friends.

Pixar’s Inside Out has taught us all not to underestimate the different aspects of our emotions — and how sadness is especially important. But, how could we possibly let everyone around us know that we’re full to the brim with despair?

The princesses, of course, have taught us the perfect method to let all those devastating emotions out — by throwing ourselves dramatically on whatever semi-flat surface we can find. If you say that you haven’t followed their example at least once in your life, we know that you’re lying!

Going to a new hairdresser that you don’t quite trust yet can be quite a nerve-wracking experience, especially when you’re working on growing your hair out. Sadly, there’s a very good reason to be wary of unknown hair salons.

We’ve all been through the experience of getting our hair cut and styled, only to be horribly disappointed by the result. So, unlike Rapunzel, don’t let some random person at your hair — go to someone you absolutely trust with your tresses.

Let’s face it, we’ve all seen those princesses look poised and aesthetically pleasing in their sleep. Despite knowing that we all probably look like drooling trolls when we’re resting, we all want to wake up looking perfect.

Thankfully, Disney has finally (finally!) given us a more realistic bedhead role model with Frozen’s Princess Anna. But, we bet that if the movie had shown Elsa sleeping — she would’ve looked absolutely flawless. One step forward, two steps back.

To our more logically-inclined readers, making a pro-con list for getting into a possible romantic entanglement makes perfect sense. Us romantics, though, are more comfortable just going with our gut, even if we’re really wrong.

Judging from this fantastic list, clearly, sweet Belle was totally trying to be all rational and clever about her life. But, after seeing that incredible library, we really can’t blame her for following her heart into this very illogical decision.

Troubles of the heart are certainly a thing to agonize over — “they love me, they love me not” constantly runs through our minds when we have a new crush. But, let’s all agree that there really are levels of sorriness.

Okay, so being in the middle of a love triangle like Jasmine is, isn’t as romantic as it sounds. But, really, being as heart-breakingly loveless as poor Quasimodo is a whole lot worse. Besides, Jasmin got the man of her dreams; what did Quasimodo get?!

In the ranking of most empowering princesses, Cinderella doesn’t usually come off as a feminist icon. In fact, she’s usually considered to be on the lowest rungs alongside her older friends, Snow White and Aurora.

But, let’s get one thing straight — no man, not even a prince, will keep this lady from leaving the party exactly when she wants to! After all, don’t forget that she never asked her fairy godmother to fall in love — all she wanted was a night out to party.

If there’s one lesson we can learn from cool and clever Megara from Hercules, is that we all really need a flamin’ best friend to drop sassy truth bombs on us on occasion.

It’s especially necessary when we’re grappling with something as big as our possible love life. After all, who else but your blunt best friend will tell you that you’re making a horrible mistake by dating some guy? Good thing she didn’t listen, though.

We’ve all felt perfectly safe on our personal social media pages, secure in the belief that we were on a private account and no one would be able to find us — just like sweet and plucky Rapunzel in her tower.

And just like the long-haired princess, we’ve been surprised when some stranger slid into our DMs with a worrying amount of ease. Or, maybe you’ve been the one to take part in some internet sleuthing to find details on your crush?

We’ve all been taught by Disney that “true love’s kiss” is basically the most powerful force in the universe — and we’ve got to say that there might be a smidge of truth in that old fairy tale rule.

But, here’s the thing (and it’s pretty freaking important) — kissing someone (and loving them) should only happen when both parties know each other and are conscious!!! Clearly, Snow White’s savior prince had never heard of consent.

Every fashion guru influencer out there knows that the secret to getting that perfect Instagram pic is controlling the scene. Being in charge of angles, lighting, pose, and quality will help you ensure you get the perfect princess photo every time.

Sadly, that control goes out the window when it’s someone else that’s holding the camera and taking truly candid photos of you. When that’s the case, you’d be lucky to only look like an ugly step-sister and not a troll.

Aladdin has taught young kids quite a few questionably valuable lessons over the years. Like, get your parents to let you adopt a tiger. Or, it’s okay to steal things as long as you’re a nice guy.

They did get some things very right, though. Basically, if you’re rich, you can get away with practically everything you want (like a certain castle and a girl). Oh, also, people (and genies) should be free.

While the internet might be divided on whether or not Ursula is a squid or an octopus (it all depends on whether you count her two human arms as additional tentacles), we can all agree that she’s the original catfish.

After all, she fools the entire royal court by making a few “light” cosmetic changes, just like those internet catfishes! Personally, though, we’d take being a sassy and all-powerful sea witch over being a boring human any day.

Let’s go back in time, to our school days, when we were asked to complete an assignment in a group. If you had a good and reliable friend with you, those assignments would be done with no trouble at all (and even quite a bit of fun).

But if you didn’t (and you weren’t one of those super smart kids that everybody wanted on their team), then you can probably relate to this perfect meme. Plus, let’s face it, Flynn Rider was the ultimate problem child in class.

Look, we get that Prince Adam (a.k.a the Beast) was an immensely rich royal, and he had tons of servants and all that. But surely he had some furniture that was just, you know, furniture?

Plus, do you remember the “Be Our Guest” sequence — what’s up with all those little tea cups?! How is every single one of them sentient?! Can anyone ask Mrs. Potts how long a teapot’s pregnancy is?

Being a princess doesn’t mean you have to be a damsel in distress. In fact, most modern Disney princesses have taught us that being resourceful and self-sufficient are the true qualities of a royal lady. Especially when it comes to the use of kitchen utensils!

After all, how else would you know that your simple household items could be used as defensive weapons in the case of a charmingly handsome intruder? Or as a central part of your hair care routine?

Falling into a routine of work, home, and work again can often make us burn out and feel as if life has no more beauty and joy in it. Thankfully, we have Pocahontas and John Smith to remind us how to let loose.

All you’ve got to do is embrace your inner animated hero and “paint with all the colors of the wind.” Let’s all be as into things as John Smith is in Pocahontas!

We might tell everyone that we watch Disney movies over and over because of the complexity of the plot, the depth of the characters, or the beauty of the animation. But, let’s be honest, we’re totally lying!

We absolutely watch the movies for their extremely catchy songs! We just want a whole Disney karaoke night where we get to badly belt out our favorite tunes from each film. Could you “keep it in?”

Ask any friend around you who has worked a customer service or retail job in their life how that was for them, and you’d be bombarded with hours and hours of horror stories.

Honestly, after dealing with annoying, entitled, and stupid customers, it’s no wonder that our princesses became evil queens. After all that they’ve had to deal with, can you really blame them for it?

Little Tinkerbell might not be a princess, but we just related so much to this meme that we just had to dub her an honorary royal lady. After all, we, too, need tons of attention to stay alive.

Fun fact — did you know that in the original stage play version of Peter Pan, Tinkerbell needed so much attention that the way to bring her “back to life” was for the whole audience to clap as loud as they could?

Annoyingly, if there’s one bad lesson that we’ve all learned from Disney’s princess movies, it’s what to look for in a romantic relationship. Our best advice? In your own relationships, look for the opposite of what Disney shows you in the love department.

Because clearly, being kissed when we’re unconscious or not being able to communicate (because a sea witch literally took our voice) really aren’t great bases for a strong relationship. Clearly, Disney needs to stop relying on love at first sight.

As a young woman, Elsa is certainly an all-powerful spirit of nature with immense powers. Sadly, it seems that growing old and raising a Prince Charming takes its toll on a woman’s goodness, and she becomes a conniving fairy godmother.

Okay, yes, we know that Shrek belongs to a different animation studio entirely. But you’ve got to admit that the visual similarities between these two characters are uncanny. Just a reminder that Frozen came out long after Fairy Godmother hit the screen.

Like Disney films, memes can be a great source of knowledge and life lessons. Memes, though, are even better than those beloved movies. That’s because they can cross over with so many other things that don’t belong to the Disney corporation.

This meme is the perfect example of that. After all, whether it’s “letting it go” or “going into Mordor,” there are so many important things “one does not simply” do!

Kids are known to often come out with a dramatic declaration (“I’m running away forever!”), and then to go back on it pretty quickly (“Maybe I’ll just run away tomorrow…”). What we never expected, is to realize that Disney princesses do the same thing.

Clearly, Elsa needs to learn to actually put the past “in the past.” While she might have learned to let go of some things, there seem to still be quite a few issues she needs to untangle before she can really be free.

Rational people would tell you that in order to solve your problem, you need to tackle them head-on, one by one, until you’ve found a solution for each of them. But, that sounds like a whole lot of work.

Thankfully, Alice in Wonderland has a much easier solution for us, and we don’t care how ineffective it is. We’ll just enjoy our grand feast of procrastination and avoidance; thank you very much.

Ariel’s completely bewildered meeting with a fork — or shall we say, “Dinglehopper” — has become infamous. After all, every kid knows what a fork is! But, this meme absolutely highlights why this scene is a lot weirder than we thought.

Because, really, a trident is just a giant sea fork. So why wouldn’t Ariel call the utensil a “mini trident” or something like that? Don’t you just love it when a Disney movie makes even less sense than you thought it did?